"You Too" and Stuff...

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Thursday, April 28, 2005

I Love Nerds...

Thanks to an anonymous poster at this site, it's now known to everyone why nerds are the best lovers of all...

1) Nerds are well-meaning 9 out of 1o times, as opposed to that sly guy with the toothy grin and wandering hands...

2) Nerds always call when they say they will. Major points there.

3) Nerds are useful. In this tech-saavy world, it's great to have a guy who can make your laptop, desktop, and just about anything that plugs into the wall behave itself.

4) Nerds are romantic. Although their idea of romance is designing a spiffy web page naming all of the reasons why they love you, it will last longer than flowers...plus you can show it your friends.

5) There are plenty of nerds to choose from. You like skinny boys with glasses? You like them shorter with a few extra pounds? Have your pick.

6) Nerds are smart. You can never have too much intelligence in a man. They're usually well-educated, physics majors and the like. You won't have to listen to him blather on about his car, he'll have more worldly things to discuss.

7) Nerds are good at remembering things. They'll remember your shoe size, your birthday, or your best friend's cats' name if they know it will make you happy. They've had plenty of time to memorize things, lists and such...Can you imagine the list that they've put together for things that they would like to do once they finally GOT a girlfriend??

8) That leads us to this: Nerds know sex. Imagine all that time they've spent thinking about sex, dreaming about sex, imagining sex coupled with a desire to make you happy...wow...

9) Nerds are low-maintenence. Most nerds can be fueled with Mountain Dew and Twinkies. No need to make fancy dinners here. Just have the number to the nearest Domino's handy...

10) Nerds go to bars about as frequently as slugs go to salt mines. You won't have to worry about your guy getting his groove on with the club hotties because he'll be too busy rooting around his computer wondering where that spare cable went. You won't have to worry about him flirting because he'll zip past those mad honies to get to the nearest electronics store as fast as he can.

11) Nerds compromise easily. He may not want to attend every outing with you, but he's willing to arrange "swaps." You attend his Game Con dressed like an elf princess and he'll take you to the ballet.

12) Nerds don't have friends that are jerks. They will treat you with the utmost respect and even awe. A cute girl has selected one of their clan to date? Hope! It could happen to them!

13) Nerds aren't judgemental. They trust you so you can be yourself around them. They don't care what you're wearing, if you're sporting make-up or not, whether you've washed your hair, if you've gained a few pounds...it doesn't matter to them. They won't make you feel like crap.

14) Nerds will never say, "Yaw Dawg Whazzup?", unless it's in jest. They spell correctly, they use proper punctuation, and are able to tell the difference between a toilet and the floor.

The final reason why nerds make great boyfriends....

15) Nerds care about you. They like you for you. That kind of thing lasts longer than "Damn Baby, you've got a nice ass!" Believe me.

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